2012 Most Ridiculous Bowls

So I started the "Most Ridiculous Bowls" post pretty much right when I started the blog.  That year, I took a lot of time breaking it down by stupid names, stupid locations, and how many bowls we the taxpayers sponsored (read: company took bailout money.  It was quite a few).

Making a list...

This year... I honestly didn't even know where to begin.  With the new kid on board, the holidays a coming, and fun trip to the local beer store with the cuz... forget it.  Let's just break it down by category and get this absurdity over with.  And yes, I'm looking at you, Discover Orange Bowl.






Wait, they're Division 1??? - The following schools are all in bowl games:  Louisiana-Lafayette (side note - in because Louisiana Tech held out for a better bowl.  Not kidding), Western Kentucky, San Jose State, Louisiana-Monroe, and Arkansas State.  I know we're all looking forward to spending December 26th winding down from the holidays watching the fighting... Western Kentucky's.  We also have to give a special nod to Northern Illinois, who busted the BCS, despite losing to Iowa.  I'd share my feelings on that, but Kirk Herbstreit did a way better job, so let's give him the floor.

My idol

Wait, that's a company??? - Raise your hand if you've heard of the following companies:  Gildan, Belk, Beef O'Brady's, R and L Carriers, Bridgepoint Education, Taxpayer.com, "Heart of Dallas", or BBVA Compass. They all sponsor bowl games.  I also dig bowls like the Chick Fil A, where the company is fairly regional.  I love me some Chick Fil A for sure.  My parents had never been to one til we took ARG there during their visit when lil' LB was born.  ARG loves the playground and the chicken.  Daddy digs the chicken bagel breakfast sandwich.  Hmmmmm, reprocessed chicken on a bagel.

Who's Playing on New Year's Day??? - This award goes to the aforementioned Heart of Dallas Bowl, pitting Purdue v. Oklahoma State, kicking off our New Year's bowl watching at noon.  Purdue plays on New Year's... LSU, Texas, and Oregon State do not.  I would include all the games played after January 1st that should be on New Year's, but then we'd have to discuss how the BCS is nothing but a cash grab, and I wouldn't want to offend the NCAA, who cares so much about it's student athletes that it pulls them out of class for 3 weeks every March.  Not that I'm objecting to that one...

The streak ends this year.  Hooah!!!

Wait, Who's Playing... at all??? - There are fully 26 teams playing in bowls who have at least 5 losses, including a boat load of teams from power conferences.  This doesn't include Navy, who will be getting its fifth loss this Saturday while Mojo, Papa Mojo, and I celebrate in the stands in the Linc.  HOOAH!!!  Of those 27 (count it), 12 are 6-6, and one, Georgia Tech, is 6-7.  If we just took those teams out, we could ditch 13 of these pointless games, put all the best games except the title game on New Year's, and order would be restored, i.e., we could wake up hungover, start drinking again, and eat junk food all day.  Then again, we would miss out on the Belk Bowl...

Most Ridiculous Game Award - And this year's winner?  I think they've won every year, but it's gotta be the R and L Carriers New Orleans Bowl, Louisiana-Lafayette vs. East Carolina, noon, December 22nd.  Who... cares.  Why?  Why???  WHY???????  Thank God we're getting a playoff...

Side note - did anyone else watching the Alabama/Georgia game just think to themselves that these two teams are just on another level than any other team you saw all year?  I'm laying the 9.5 with Alabama now, and probably again when delusional Notre Dame fans bet the line down.  Should be a fun game, though.

So I post the flag pretty much every time, but this story sums up our reason today... the cuz and I were at the liquor store getting some choice, limited release winter brews.  I joked at the register that I loved America because there were like a dozen people in there at 2pm on a Sunday, spending a ton of cash on beer and liquor.  The guy at the register laughed and said, "we did $36,000 by 2pm yesterday."  They opened at 9am.  That is over $7,000/hour, about $120/minute!!!!  Well done, my fellow Americans.

Of thee I sing...

You may also be wondering why I'm not showing you more evidence of Mayan rule.... well, the Mayans seem to be laying low, cause I haven't found much lately.  Which makes me think the Mayans are laying in wait and/or know I'm on to them.

Week 14 Picks - 8-6-1/1-2/0-1 (I have jinxed my teasers); 87-86-3/15-17-1/7-3

Denver (-10) at Oakland - Raiders can't tackle.  I'm praying for a Broncos/Texans AFC title game.

Tampa Bay (-7.5) vs. Philadelphia - Tampa may be the "most better than its record" team in the NFL.  Call it a lock.

Cincinnati (-3) vs. Dallas - That's a total "everyone bets on Dallas" line.  Lock #2.  Definite teaser.

St. Louis (+3) at Buffalo - Searching for words...

Atlanta (-3.5) at Carolina - Seriously, where is Atlanta's respect?  If I were their coach, I'd just post the line every week and be like, "this is what they think of you."

Minnesota (+3) vs. Chicago - As much as Minnesota has faded, the Bears have traditionally stunk in Minnesota, Urlacher probably isn't playing, and my Bears are fading fast...

Kansas City (+6) at Cleveland - I finally got the Chiefs right last week.  My Browns are showing some spunk (I know, I have two "mys"... I might get to this in the playoffs.  I need help).  Points grab by LB.  Teaser game for sure.

Baltimore (+2.5) at Washington - Simmons recently recommended not betting against RG3.  He's probably right.  I'll bite once more, even though Baltimore is totally overrated.

Tennessee (+5.5) at Indianapolis -  Colts 23, Titans 20 = cover, yo.

NY Jets (-2.5) at Jacksonville - How much cash would it take for you to watch this game kick to finish?  I'd need at least $150 plus some wings and my bar tab covered.  I'm not kidding.

Miami (+10) at San Francisco - Just a hunch.

Seattle (-10.5) vs. Arizona - With the first pick in the 2013 NFL draft, the Arizona Cardinals bust on another USC QB who should not be taken this high!

New Orleans (+5) at NY Giants - Giants = Bears.  Anyone else realizing the Redskins have a legit shot at the NFC East.  What a crap division that is.

Green Bay (-6.5) vs. Detroit - Lock #3.  Even though the Pack can't tackle, either.

Houston (+3.5) at New England - Awesome.  Monday.  Nighter.

Three Team Teaser - I'm actually REALLY confident in this one... Denver -1, San Francisco -1, Kansas City +15.  I'll even throw in a boni teaser... Baltimore +11.5, Green Bay +2.5, Atlanta +5.5.

Contact Logical Betting at logicalbetting@gmail.com and twitter.com/logicalbetting.  Go Army, Beat Navy!!!  Hasta.