Belgium

Big news here in the LB world, though I suspect most of you reading this already know what we're going to be addressing.  We've been hinting at it in various posts, from Mojo's discussion on the meaning of home to our pre-Army v. Navy post.  I have no intro for this, though.  Honestly, I've been trying to write this first paragraph for a couple of beers now.  I even did this old writing trick where you write the rest of the paper, then go write the intro.  No dice.  Is it weird that the college track and field championships are on while I'm writing this?

I feel your pain, bro

Kids, sit down, I have something to tell you.  Mojo and family are moving to Belgium for the next 3 years.  I know your first thought was, "oh no, how is your son going to marry his daughter???" but don't worry, they'll be back.  Besides, it gives us a good reason to give him a proper send off when we're back in the D in a few weeks.  It hasn't quite hit me yet that they're going, and I think it's quite possible it won't really hit me until he doesn't respond to evening texts (or does with an incoherent, half-awake and/or really drunk talk-to-text response), or when I go to Army-Navy without him.  I guess that's a silver lining in the fact we haven't lived within about 4 hours of each other since high school.  I do know that I couldn't be happier or more excited for them, while at the same time knowing I'll miss them dearly.

That concludes the emotional piece of this post.  Rather than regale you with tales of how long we've been friends, gotten closer over the years, etc., I thought we'd give Mojo a more Logical Betting-esque send off, because it is really a "see you later" and not a good-bye.  Let's begin with the following exchange between Fah T. and I right after we found out Mojo would be moving:

See you all soon!!!

Me - Did you hear Mojo is moving to Belgium?

Fah - Yeah, I just heard.

Me - Pretty crazy, right?

Fah - I know... (pauses).  Guess we're going to Oktoberfest

Me - F**k yes we are.

That conversation kinda sums it up.  We're all still kinda surprised, not sure how it's gonna look, but also really excited for them and the opportunity to see them in Europe.  The wife had a similar response, a sort of mix to ask how I felt about him going, how they were doing (excited), then "how far is that from Paris?"  Answer - not very far.

So since all of you probably don't know much about Belgium, I thought we'd spend our time together today educating you on the place, and, if applicable, how it may affect Mojo's family's future.  

- Belgium was formed in 1839 after the Belgian Revolution from 1830-1839, which led to the formation of modern Belgium, the Netherlands, and Luxemborg.  There are only 2 types of people I can't stand...

- The average life expectancy in Belgium is 80.88 years, compared to 79.68 years in the U.S.  That means his family may live a little longer than all of ours.  That's about 425 more days to drink good Belgian beers and eat their chocolate.  Speaking of which...

Desired effect

- Belgian chocolate is among the most popular chocolates in the world and is a large part of the country's economy.  On the plus side, they can crush it the entire time they're there.  However, I'm seeing a couple problems here.  First, my mission in life is to make sure BGE gets as many M&Ms from me as possible.  (I told his mother about 2 million when we see them before we go... she did not approve, though offered to leave him with me for the week if we did that).  If he gets used to Belgian chocolate, the M&Ms may lose their desired effect.  Second, let's assume for a minute that Mojo and I occasionally test our wives patience.  Now, while in Belgium, Mojo could use the chocolate as a peace offering.  But when he gets back?  Damn, he's either gotta import that stuff or find something more expensive to make up for any alleged transgressions.  

Famous

- Belgium is 3,751 miles from Philly.  That's a lot of distance between LB, Jr. and his future bride, Mojo's 2nd daughter.  Unfortunate for me, but Mojo is probably cool with that.

- Some famous Belgians include Adolphe Sax, the inventor of the saxophone; Albert Claude, the first biochemist to isolate a cancer cell; and Dr. Evil's father.  Also, the Smurfs were invented here.

- The legal drinking age to drink beer and wine in Belgium is 16 and the legal age to drink spirits is 18.  These laws are "rarely enforced."  This assures us they will be back before C turns 14.  Relatedly, it's a REALLY REALLY good thing we didn't grow up in Belgium.

- The primary exports of Belgium are machinery and equipment, chemicals, finished diamonds, metals and metal products, and "food stuffs."  Not sure what the last one means, but it does guarantee Fah will be visiting frequently, though they do have one of the lowest concentrations of McDonald's in the world.  French fries are believed to be invented in Belgium, rather than France, by the by.  They also mine quite a bit of coal.  Transportation and the chemical industry are cornerstones of their economy.  So the kids are looking at futures as crazy wealthy scientists or coal miners.  I guess that will be determined by whether they take advantage of those loose liquor laws.

Biere

- The official languages of Belgium are Dutch (damn them!!!), French, and German.  Mojo and family have been brushing up on their French, and I believe Mrs. Mojo is pretty good in both French and German.  They are staying in the part of the country that speaks primarily French, so I've been brushing up in anticipation of visiting.  I know one word so far.  Biere.  I think I can wing it from there.

- Belgium has quite a few unique holidays, some depending on the region of the country based on the primary languages I referenced above.  They celebrate a lot of Catholic holy days.  Looks like quite a few extra school days off for the kids.  However, I think they'll be most excited about "2nd Day of Christmas" that's celebrated on December 26th.  Maybe Mojo can spend some of my tax money on extra gifts for BGE on that day.

Likely to regret this

I found a bunch more interesting stuff about Belgium, but I'm realizing this is starting to sound like a 5th grade social studies project on Belgium.  Plus, my beer is about empty and I should probably eat something before I pass out go to bed.  In reality, I think I'm just stalling cause I'm not sure how to end this.  Kind of like, selfishly, I don't want it to be true, even though I'm so excited and happy that it is true for Mojo and his family.  Such a cool adventure and doing it for the highest of causes.

I mentioned in my AOR post that life can have a funny way of keeping you from doing the things you love.  In the past year, things have somehow aligned perfectly in Mojo and I's friendship.  Consider all of this...

1.  BGE's baptism was over Labor Day weekend, which is typically muggy and hot in North Carolina.  The weather that weekend was perfect, which allowed for a nice run with the local RWB chapter, 18 holes on Pinehurst #3, the post-baptism cook out, and the post-cookout bonfire.  The day after I left, I remember Mrs. Mojo posting something about the weather going back to crazy hot.

2.  Army beat Navy.  After something like 11 years attending that game together, Army finally f**ing beat Navy.  When Army was driving down for the game winning touchdown, I was seriously losing my mind screaming at the game.  One of Mojo's Army buddies looked at me and goes, "bro, you care about us winning this game more than we do."  I turned to him and yelled, "he's moving to f**ing Belgium this summer, THEY HAVE TO WIN NOW!!!"  Later found out I was the only one who had the celebratory moonshine when we got home.  But I digress...

3.  Our family always spends 4th of July week in the D.  Mojo and crew visit a little more often, as both their families are still in Michigan.  We've never been able to quite coordinate our visits the last few years.  This year, we'll both be there the entire time we're home.

4.  Finally, after many years of joking about getting tattoos after Army beats Navy, the most patient women on the planet, our wives, have relented to our getting tattoos the day before our family heads back to Philly and about 3 days before Mojo heads overseas.  Cool final memory before we meet again on the other side of the pond.

I'm not sure what else to say.  My beer is officially empty.  Mojo would tell me to stop typing and take care of that first.  I guess I'll just end by honoring his wishes and looking forward to spending a lot of time with him and the rest of our crew in the D next week.  Cheers!

I'm not sure when you'll hear from us again.  J.B. and I have a cool idea for a Pearl Jam post that involves us meeting at the bar to write it, but he's about to have a 2nd baby so that may get pushed back to the fall.  Had a couple other cool ideas from Fah and my boy down the street.  Maybe Mojo will chime in from Belgium first.  I would anticipate a long break, though, kiddos.  Summer is chill time, spring has been crazy, and it might take Mojo and I awhile to figure out that time change thing.  In the meantime, follow us on Twitter.  Only the Doors could provide the soundtrack for this post.  (Mojo, make sure you click that one).  See my people in the D soon, and to the rest of you, hasta.